Today a friend of mine posted on Facebook that she was looking for other bloggers. Who, amongst her friends, kept a blog and who would be willing to blogswap? I'll read yours if you read mine. Initially I thought it was a great idea and I immediately responded, telling her I had a blog. And then I stopped. It hit me that if I put my blog address there on her Wall that other people might actually stop by and read my blog -- and that frightened me. Why?
I am completely loving my blog. I love writing it and I love that my friends read it and comment on it and share their thoughts about my thoughts. But today I had to consider the possibility that people I don't know might read my blog. Am I ready for that? Although my blog is technically public, it never really occurred to me that just anyone might read it. And now that I think about it, sharing my blog with random readers is really not that scary, given that they have no idea who I am. I've got nothing to lose.
I have also not advertised my blog on my Facebook page. I could. I would have more readers, perhaps even more followers. But do I really want all of my "Facebook Friends" and old schoolmates, colleagues and room moms reading about my innermost thoughts and private struggles? Obviously not. But why?
Why am I being so protective? Why am I so unwilling to let the world in to my little piece of cyberspace? I suppose because that would mean putting myself out there. It would mean risking humiliation and showing vulnerability. It would be careless. And I'm not ready for that yet. I wonder if I ever will be.
It kind of sounds like a dilemma between a desire for popularity and a fear of the unknown. It also looks like the path from being introverted to be(com)ing (more) extraverted. One risk of course is that sooner or later all members of the UN-family come across your blog ...
ReplyDeleteInteresting topic. It's one that's near and dear to my heart, as well. Aside from our mutual friend Miss K and yourself...nobody who reads my blog is someone I know in "real life".
ReplyDeleteOften times, I've been tempted to share the existence of my blog with my best friend (usually after a couple of drinks!), but I am SO GLAD that I haven't. I really feel that the anonymity of the venue frees me to say things that I would *never* say if certain people were reading my words (and don't even get me started about my husband...I'm never even TEMPTED to share the existance of my blog with him, hahaha!).
The strangers don't bug me at all, funny enough. It's the judgement and/or input from the RL folks that I find daunting...
I feel ya. My blog works simply because I don't share things that are too personal, for fear of judgement. Instead, I share random thoughts, music I like, photos, etc. Things that I enjoy that I think others may too. I enjoy my privacy and keeping more of my personal thoughts to myself or limiting my sharing to people that warrant it. Hmmmm. The internet is a funny place.
ReplyDeletePS. I miss you too! One of these days, when school and work slow down a bit, I gotta get myself over to dance.